February 27, 2010

I get so tired of hearing the phrase, "But, well, that is what boys are like."  Which is no different from saying, "But, well, that is what girls are like." Which is no different from saying, "But, well, that is what blacks are like." Which is no different from saying, "But, well, that is what Jews are like."

Boys are not louder, more violent, ruder, more physical, smarter, or dumber than girls.  Girls are not more fractious or social than boys.  I mean, seriously, can we please be done with the sexism?   It fatigues me.  I've been working with kids for over twenty years now.  They are all violent, rude, brilliant, and compassionate in their turn.   Boys, in general, are not innately hyper unless you teach them to be that way.  Children are not mean spirited or selfish unless you teach them to be that way.  Girls are not backbiting unless you teach them to be that way.  One usually hears the phrase, "But, well, that is what .........s are like" from people who secretly wish to escape responsibility for parenting.  Or we hear it from people who are secretly proud.  Its okay to be proud.  Go ahead and be proud of your child.  But be proud of their individuality, not their gender.  Because, ummmm, gender isn't all that much to be proud of, is it?  Its like being proud of someone for growing eyelashes.  Surely you can come up with better.

Neither should gender be an excuse.  Do you really want, someday, to hear your grown child excuse themselves on the basis of gender?  Sure, its true that longer bone structure will give you more leverage and you can't breastfeed without mammary glands.  But beyond physicality, what matters? Jeepers, people, grow up already.

"Little girls are cute and small only to adults. To one another they are not cute. They are life-sized." ~Margaret Atwood

5 comments:

Katherine said...

Except my son. My son grows the most perfect eyelashes in the world. We should all be proud of him and his perfectly masculine and excellent lashes. All hail him! He is the best! :o)

Ellen said...

Too right. *Respect* xP

debbiedas said...

Gorgeous Katherine. Sexism is so not dead. We need to knock it down once and for all. Aren't we all equal, afterall? How do parents live with themselves by limiting their child's potential with these windowless boxes? Oh...an my son's eyelashes...to die for. :)

Anonymous said...

K, you hit just like a girl.

Kidding, just kidding, but you hit the point right on!

Maria

Darlene Hayes, N.C. said...

This blog reminds me of being thirteen years old and wanting to be cool. How old are you?